Are you experiencing
Not being heard or respected
Mental, Emotional or physical abuse
Always being forced to relive past events
Being taken for granted
Always having to do things by yourself
Loss of love and affection
Being made to feel inferior
Not getting the attention that you deserve
or any other relationship pain?
So how did your relationship get to this point?
Relationship issues arise due to a basic principle; You are biologically wired to protect yourself from threat and pain. You are also biologically wired to connect emotionally with others.
If the person that you are in a relationship with represents on some level a threat to you, then you want to connect but cannot. This situation leads to the uncomfortable position of wanting something but at the same time pushing it away. These actions are then in turn interpreted by your partner as you don’t love them. Understanding why you see your partner as a threat is a fundamental step if your relationship is to be repaired successfully.
Why do you feel stuck?
Relationships develop through various stages. The first and the most recognised stage is the initial honeymoon period. In the honeymoon period, the focus is on the things that you have in common giving rise to a feeling that “we are one”.
After a while of being together, you start to notice that your partner is different to you in many ways. Noticing differences is a normal part of relationship development but brings with it fears that you are growing apart, that you have little in common. Resentment sets in particularly if one partner starts to embrace their differences and the other partner is still holding on to the “we are one stage”.
Many couples get stuck at this stage with generated feelings of being left behind and rejected or feeling held back and smothered. Understanding how you can be different but be in a relationship together is one of the fundamental issues that need to be addressed for the relationship to develop to its full potential.
Noticing differences does not mean the end of the relationship but instead means that the relationship is growing and if properly supported through this time will lead to an enhanced experience for you both.
Individual issues become relationship issues
The relationship starts with us. The first person that we must relate to is ourselves. How good our relationship with ourselves is, flows into our other relationships.
That is why so many things such as depression, anxiety, low self-esteem and low self-worth can tear a relationship apart over time.
Often a poor relationship with ourselves is seen in one partner expecting the other to make them happy. Happiness is something that starts with you. You need to make yourself happy first.
The origin of the problem
Our concept of what it means to be in a relationship and how relationships work is founded on the type of relationship we experienced with our caregiver when we were a child. For example, unpredictable reactions from parents to our needs tend to leave us mistrusting close relationships. Neglect from our parents tends to cause us to rely heavily on ourselves and not trust others.
Relationships are as complex as the individuals that make up the relationship. The reason your relationship is currently in trouble will be the result of several factors ranging from childhood experiences through to the way that you now react to the pressures of a relationship. It’s hard to identify and rectify these yourself. You need specialist help.
I am a relationship specialist who is passionate about seeing relationships repaired. Understanding your drives and needs is the first step in empowering yourself. Understanding others drives and needs is the foundation of healthy relationships. I believe that desire to understand yourself and others and a willingness to implement necessary changes, make relationship repair possible.
I use an honest, no-nonsense, direct approach to Relationship Counselling. There is no fluff, and no endless talking in circles waiting for people to have a light bulb moment.
My success rates with restoring relationships are high providing the couple meet certain conditions. Both parties must want to repair the relationship. Both sides must want to undertake whatever change is necessary to make this relationship work. Sounds easy but it’s not. It will be hard work, but the result makes it all worthwhile.
Sometimes the emotional damage is so significant that at least one partner lacks the drive to work towards repairing the relationship. In these cases, the relationship is unlikely to be restored. It is important that you do not wait too long before seeking help.
An important factor in my success rate lies in my ability to understand and see things from your perspective. I get inside your head and see the world as you see it so I can provide you with the solutions that you seek. I do not lay blame or label people as good or bad. Everything that you have done or are currently doing is simply a fact.
If you want to know if your relationship can be repaired then call Tracey on (07) 3458 1725. I will give you 15 minutes of my time obligation free and free of charge.
Face to Face, Skype and Telephone Counselling
3/94 George Street, Beenleigh QLD — 07 3458 1725 / 0409272115