You are so ready to succeed, so ready to be who you are, and so ready to stop struggling. Next year can’t come soon enough. You are so ready for it to be your year.
But if you are so ready for it to happen why does it never happen? Is there a mysterious force working against you or is it something that you are doing? The answer lies in two words ready and willing.
From dictionary.com – Ready has the meaning of being completely prepared or in fit condition for immediate action or use while Willing has the meaning of disposed or consenting; inclined: willing to go along
So ready means that you are prepared for things to change but without being willing for things to change nothing will change. Being willing is not as easy as it sounds. Willingness involves overcoming certain fears that will hold you back.
One thing I know about change is that there is a price involved. However, in addition to that price that you pay, there is also a reward to be gained. While we want the reward, we are fixated on what we will lose.
Our fear is that of loss and can be summed up in the following questions
- What will I have to change?
- How much effort will I have to put into this?
- What will I have to give up for this?
- Who in my life will I lose because I have taken this direction?
These are very real questions. Change means we have to leave some things behind to achieve what we want. To make change consistent effort is required. The very nature of change means that we will lose the approval of some people in our lives and as a result, we risk losing our relationship with them.
As a consequence of these challenges and the subsequent fear, we never seem to move past the state of being ready into the state of willingness. This step requires that we commit to the change despite what it is going to take because our eye on the reward and not on what we have to give up.
Fear of loss is what holds us back from doing so many things in life. This fear can be addressed by firstly defining what we’re afraid off and then secondly questioning how powerful that really is. Fear looked at objectively reveals its true nature and allows us to have power over it.
There is no magic to this process. Many people see the approaching end of the year as some magic point where they will make the resolutions for next year and their life will change. There is no magic on December 31 or 1 January. They are simply a measurement of time based on the calendar that we use. Many New Year’s resolutions fail because we are ready but not willing.
If you want to move from being ready to being ready and willing make an appointment to see me, and I can help you with this transition. Call me now (07) 3458-1725.