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Change

How to Rebuild Broken Trust

In my previous articles I looked at How to Strengthen Trust in Your Relationship and Three Reasons Why it is Difficult to Move on After There is Broken Trust. Click on the links to read these articles if you missed them. In this article I will explain how to rebuild broken trust in your relationship. Broken trust in a relationship cannot be fixed by confining the problem to the past and moving...
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Three Reasons Why it is Difficult to Move on After There is Broken Trust

Every case of broken trust impacts us on three levels, and the damage on each of these levels is what holds us back from healing the broken trust and moving on. It doesn’t matter whether the broken trust is real or perceived; impact occurs on these three levels. The Emotional Level For everything that happens in our lives whether good or bad we have an emotional reaction. Every experience that w...
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How to Strengthen Trust in Your Relationship

Two types of trust can exist in a relationship Firstly, there is conditional trust which says I trust you only when I’m having a good experience. If I’m not having a good experience, then I don’t feel that you have my back and I don’t feel safe.  The result is I don’t trust you. Conditional trust is found in the early stages of a relationship. Relationships based on conditional trust are easily b...
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Expectations – the Power to Build or Destroy a Relationship

Nobody does anything in this life without starting with expectations about how it should work. From the moment that we get up in the morning until we go to bed, we are constantly having expectations about our day. We expect that we can get to work without having an accident, we have expectations about traffic conditions, expectations about how much work we can get done in the day and so on. Des...
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What Creates Change and What Kills it

There are three phases to time as we know it. There is the past, the present and the future. The past is what has happened, it is set in stone and you can't change it. The present moment is the very moment that we are in now and then there is the future which basically hasn't happened yet. In the present, we can choose to make changes. We can't change the future because it hasn't happened...
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Three Steps to Making Change

There are three parts to making a change.   Firstly I need to believe that I CAN. Without believing that I CAN, obviously, I cannot. I need to be in a place where my beliefs at least support me starting on the journey.   I WILL is me making the choice to change. Not just knowing that I can, but making a positive decision that I will take the actions I need to take. Saying I...
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What do you want in 2019?

We are now a few days into 2019 so the enthusiasm of the start of the New Year is probably waning a little bit and the cold hard truth that this is just another year is starting to set in. Same old, same old. But you can change that if you want to. If you want this to be a different year you need to take the first step and clearly define what you want in 2019. I don't mean just some sort of gen...
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Willpower is not Enough – How to Succeed

            Often failure in life is blamed on a lack of willpower. There is, however, increasing evidence that what you "see” happening is what is holding you back. Albert Einstein once said “Imagination is more important than knowledge.” How often have you heard people say “I can’t imagine……… happening “ Most people struggle to imagine...
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Self-Care – Is it Selfish?

The Importance of Self-Care If you can’t take care of yourself first, then you will have nothing left to give to others or to put it another way, if you don’t have it, you can’t give it. Self-Care, Cars and Fuel We go to the petrol station and put petrol in our car then it goes fine until the tank runs empty. When it does, our car has got nothing left to give and stops. To make sure that ...
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If You Deserve Something Why Don’t You Have It?

It is common to hear people complain that they work so hard, try everything that they know but can never seem to get ahead. Asked if they deserve to succeed, they say of course they do. But if that is true why don’t they have what they want? We can be convinced logically that we deserve good things in our life but on a deeper level we don’t believe it. The result is us not experiencing the very...
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